I’m still waiting for next gen consoles to be worth a damn but It looks like I have a while to wait yet. The main problem seems to be that I have to trade a reasonable price for quality games. In other words, the ability to play good games is more expensive than the ability to play bad games. Funny how that works…PS3:
First off, it’s enormous. And the way it bulges out in the middle like that makes it look like an over-inflated life raft or something. I know I’ve seen computers this size, but computers do a lot of things. The only thing the PS3 needs to be able to do is run PS3 games. So why the hell does it need to be this big? Was it made in 1975? Are there vacuum tubes and tape reels in there?
Then there’s the price. I’m not going to pay $500 for the platform and then $60 for every subsequent game. It’s ridiculous. Not only that, they felt the need to make different models with different hard drive capacities at different prices. Well I hope you know the exact amount of hard drive space all of the games you will ever install is because if you don’t buy the correct amount you’re making a really expensive mistake. This isn’t a good thing. It’s just frustrating. Why have to install games at all? Well it makes load times shorter but what it ultimately does is inhibit the amount of games you can keep by varying degrees depending on how much money you fork over.
Maybe someday I’ll think about it when the price goes down enough but while I can still get new PS2 games and Devil May Cry and Splinter Cell cost $6 in the used bin I have little initiative to buy one.
Wii:
It’s embarrassing just saying the name of this consol let alone playing it. I remember when it was called the Nintendo “Revolution.” (Why does Nintendo always have to code name their stuff?) Anyway I recall thinking that the Revolution was a stupid name for a video game consol. Then later I was reading some magazine and learned that the official name was now the Nintendo Wii. Suddenly, the name Revolution seemed a lot less retarded than I had initially thought.
I couldn’t care less if my consol had motion sensing capabilities. In fact I think I’d rather it not have them. I understand the motion you
perform with the wii-mote is similar to the action in the game but it still doesn’t change the fact that you’re swinging around a TV remote like a moron.
The real problem though is that there aren’t any games on the Wii that don’t suck ass. God help me, I’m just not that enthused with creating a hideously deformed avatar and then suffering through nine holes of golf with it, or any other sport for that matter. Golf isn’t fun in reality. Why would it be fun on the Wii. Party games are stupid and so are mini games, at least as a purchase. Getting in shape is not entertaining either so I
guess that cancels out about 96% of the games on Wii. Also I’m so tired of Mario at this point he can kiss my ass. We need another Mario game like we need another shitty Will Farrell movie.The only cool thing about the Wii is that you can buy retro games off of the internet with it. At least it would be cool if you couldn‘t already get retro game roms off of the internet for free with your computer. Then it would be of great interest to me and wouldn’t seem like such a gravy train.
360:The Xbox is obsolete. There, I said it. Well, maybe obsolete isn’t the correct word. It’s more like pointless. Since it’s made by Microsoft, every game on it is default ported to the PC. And if that’s the case then there is nothing an Xbox can do that a PC can’t do as well or better. So why would I buy one? Why would anyone buy one? (Unless they have a Mac.) It would be like if you had a regular computer keyboard and then went out and bought another keyboard that only had number buttons on it and was made specifically for typing numbers. And any time you wanted to type numbers on your computer, instead of using the ones on your regular keyboard you use the ones on your special numerical keyboard. Then it has a hardware failure and you have to buy another one. Doesn’t that sound like a worthwhile investment?
Holy Shit... I just realized that all of the consol names rhyme with eachother.
